I recently got engaged. Her name is Amy Perrey and she is the girl of my dreams. I wonder sometimes how I got so lucky to find her. I don't know what I did that impressed her so much that she actually said yes to a proposal, but I do remember trying to play it cool. All guys try this, and eventually the truth comes out. Now that I have been with Amy for over nine weeks she is starting to see the truth--I'm not that cool.
Here are five examples:
1)Amy was impressed with my knowledge of films. I don't watch movies. I watch films. I don't watch hour and half long frat boy movies full of breasts and beer but five hour long German Expessionistic silent films full of paradox and pretention.
But also...I like Star Trek!
2)Amy was impressed with how well-read I am. I don't read novels. I read literature. I don't read airport staples like Michael Crichton and John Grishom with their identifiable, predictable characters, but French existential literature with their absurd, ammoral anti-heroes.
But also...I read fantasy novels!
3)Amy liked how hip my music tastes are. I don't listen to pop. I listen to indie. I listen and brood to proto-punk, punk, post-punk, crust punk, anarcho-punk,skate-punk, prog, experimental, noise rock, shoegazing, new wave, no wave, electro, dub, acoustic, folk,straight edge, political, passifistic, vegan, alternative, straight edge,hardcore, thrashcore, mathcore, lo-fi, avant-garde, sythesized, nihilistic, distorted, atonal, and melancholic music.
But also...I have Mariah Carey's greatest hits!
4)Amy likes my indie look. I don't dress casually. I dress indie: black rimmed glasses, band-tees, vintage shirts, Chuck Taylor's,Dickies, suspenders, shaggy hair, messy hair, messenger bag, and hoodies. For a better visual visit your local B & N.
But also...I had a rat tail in the sixth grade!
5)Amy likes my sarcastic sense of humor. I don't laugh with you. I laugh at you. I have no time for your banal, sentimental observations about every flower that reminds you of your childhood. Your sanctimonious moments are my ironic observations. I roll my world-wearied eyes at your romantic gushes.
But also...I have a scrap book!
Now that you all know this I have to ask, "Please still be my friend!" And Amy, "Please still marry me!"
4 comments:
Oh B.J., those are all things that make me so happy we're friends, and it makes me even more happy to hear that Amy loves you because and in spite of those things. :) You can call me sappy if you want, but it's good confirmation, in my opinion, that you've found the right girl!
Dear Beej,
Yes.
Love,
The Woman who pretends to be nice, but called you a rat bastard in front of four of your friends. (Despite of this, you still seem to like her.)
Thanks for weeding out all the boy bands in her CD collection. I knew you weren't cool when I introduced you to her--but we like you anyway.
Remember, you're unique.
Just like everybody else.
Glad I could insert a lovely encouraging thought into your day. :D
Yes, this is Julie.
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